"Take it From Me:" The Fashion Tips of Nadine Cowherd
Nadine Cowherd didn't land the future president of Texas by being shy about her looks. No sirree, the FLOT (First Lady of Texas) slapped on some lipstick and a pushup bra and challenged Jack to seize her assets with both hands. Which, much to her satisfaction, he did.
Now Nadine wants to share the secrets of her success by offering the following fashion tips to the women of Texas. As Nadine says, "Not every women can look as fabulous as me, but they can at least try."
Nadine Cowherd’s fashion tips
1. Always be the youngest woman at the party. If that’s not possible: Botox.
2. No man ever said no to a plunging neckline.
3. Partially hidden tattoos are great conversation starters BUT
4. Beware the tramp stamp. A backless gown reveals all.
5. Shave all your body hair. Yes, that too.
6. If you must have your nose pierced, avoid those things that look like silver boogers hanging from your nostrils.
7. Heels are acceptable, maybe even mandatory, in a casual ensemble.
8. If your stomach sticks out farther than your boobs, stay away from the bikini rack. Also, I know a great plastic surgeon.
9. They are not false eyelashes; merely eyelash extensions.
10. Go easy on the perfume. Unless you sweat a lot; then spray it on like mosquito repellent.